Lois M. DeLapp

Lois M. DeLapp was born Lois Mae Wolf in North Rose, NY, on July 18, 1937, the third child of Irene Edna Everett and Clark A. Wolf. In 1963, she married Robert F DeLapp (1933-2003). She died peacefully after a long illness on June 23, 2026, shortly before her 89th birthday. She was predeceased by two older siblings, Jeanne DeSantis and James Clark Wolf; her husband, Robert; and her son, Andrew. She is survived by her daughter, Jennifer (Clay) Birkett; daughter-in-law, Amie Alscheff; grandson, Nathan Birkett; brother, Walter Doherty; sister-in-law, Mary DeLapp Stevens; brothers-in-law, Richard DeLapp and Robert Pryor, and many nieces and nephews and their families. Lois graduated from Oswego High School in 1955. She began college at The King's College in Briarcliff Manor, but soon moved back home to complete her education degree at Oswego State. She taught junior-high English for several years, wearing high heels to differentiate herself from the students. A summer trip to England, part of her master's work, gave her a lifelong love of Shakespeare, Beatrix Potter, Jane Austen, and Virginia Woolf; and a passion for English history and the English language in general. In the last summer course needed for her master's degree, she met Robert DeLapp, another Oswego native, who taught elementary industrial arts in Rochester during the school year. They were engaged that November and married three months later on February 15, 1964. They moved into a house on Paul Road in Chili Center; Jenny and Andy were born soon after. The family was active in Parkminster Presbyterian Church into the 1980s. Lois was full of ideas for family activities, and Bob helped her put them into practice: cross country skiing, camping trips, national park visits, outings to cultural events, including annual visits to the Shakespeare festival in Stratford Ontario. In the 1970s the family purchased a 40-acre camp south of Dansville NY, where Lois proved herself fearsome with a lawnmower, carving paths through shoulder-high goldenrod. Although she had stopped teaching to start a family, books and education remained central to Lois's identity. In her 40s, she enrolled in a doctoral program at the University of Rochester's school of education, completing all required coursework and exams. Her research interest was in books that were banned from high school libraries, and the debates surrounding them. After she withdrew from the program, her love of language shifted to leading a writers' group at Pearce Church in North Chili. Her book collection at home filled multiple rooms. Lois loved music. Her children heard opera broadcasts full blast in utero; throughout their childhood, her lullabies were a cherished part of the bedtime routine. She made certain they took music lessons and she claimed to enjoy hearing them practice. She brought her autoharp into their school classrooms to sing folksongs. When wrestling with deep questions about life, she wrote her own songs and poems, and Bob typed them up for her. She also appreciated visual art, especially Georgia O'Keefe. In later years, it brought her great joy to find the perfect frame for her favorite prints, photos or original artwork. Lois thrived on connections with people: neighbors, friends at church, and later certain helpers at her nursing home. She was known for her fun, zany personality, for thoughtful gifts, compassionate and intense conversations, a resistance to convention, and loyal friendships. She was a lifelong advocate for women in professional careers. She entertained young relatives with silly outbursts and improvised songs. Lois helped her husband navigate his final, eleven-year illness with imagination and endurance, starting with a glorious cross-country road trip to the Pacific Ocean, a move to a new single-level home, trips to Philadelphia to visit Andy and Amie, and to Washington DC to visit Jennifer. After Bob's death in 2003, she continued to maintain the family cabin, moved several times, became a grandmother, and enjoyed many years of independent living before a major stroke early in 2020 necessitated her move to the Episcopal Church Home. In her last six years, her language abilities were frustratingly curtailed, but her personality shone through, via colorful hats, blown kisses, strong opinions, and merry smiles. Family and friends may call at the Leo M. Bean and Sons Funeral Home, 2771 Chili Ave. Rochester NY 14624 Friday, June 26th from 3-5 pm. Funeral Service to follow calling at 5pm at the funeral home. Graveside Service Saturday 10am at N. Chili Rural Cemetery. In lieu of flowers, donations can be made to The Nature Conservancy https://preserve.nature.org/page/173850/donate/1 or to the Pearce Church Food Cupboard (https://onrealm.org/PearceChurch/-/form/give/now)

Lois M. DeLapp

July 18, 1937 - June 23, 2026